17 June, 2009

Month of Lasts

Mount Fuji from the Shinkansen; May 2009

The stress has suddenly sneaked up on me & smacked me round the head with a resounded, 'thunk'.
Knew it was too good to be true. Still, things could be WAY worse. There isn't too much to stress me out - main two things are time & money.
Luckily, Daddy Sin & The German have both been very supportive - Thank You! Both of you - even though i have completely sacrificed my feminist values by getting the men in my life to help me out.
Then again, i never had any feminist values to begin with...unless it got me a free beer :)

ANYWAY - before i degenerate into some stress induced rant...

Things ARE coming together.
Have my main sayonara party planned: Sunday 21st June @ Blue Corn
(where else? And if you're reading this & i haven't invited you, consider yourself invited; from 3pm)
Know my last day of work: Tuesday 30th June
Have fixed a date to move out of my flat: Friday 3rd July
Have planned my last weekend: Kurihama with M&S
Have fixed a date to leave: Monday 6th July
Have decided on a moving company: Nippon Express

And how am i feeling about it all? My overwhelming feeling is that of excitement. I am really looking forward to starting my new life.
The second feeling is 'I wish this would be over'. Moving is stressful and now i know why i haven't done it for 12 years. The funny thing is, it's not stressing me in the way expected. I was expecting to be stressed by the amount of crap i have managed to accumulate.
Actually what is stressing me more is all the logistics & bureaucracy of it all. It just all takes time & energy. And when you're working full-time AND doing it all on your own, it is hard.
BUT it is definitely do-able. And once i've done it, it'll be over.
And i'll be able to be proud of myself for doing it. So There.

The third feeling is the melancholic/nostalgic feelings. Japan has been part of my life for SO long now. More than half my life in fact; came here in August 1991 when i was 17. You do the maths.
Have been staving off the melancholy/nostaligia; but every so often it creeps up on me.
Keep having moments of 'Oh, this is probably my last _____'
So far my list of lasts includes:
Last ride on a shinkansen
Last view of Mount Fuji (see above)
Last Yukata
Last business trip & Izu
Last Mooney night @ Blue Corn
Last class in Japan
And the list keeps growing...

Funny thing is, i've missed some Lasts. Didn't realise they were my Lasts until later (eg the view of Fuji). So now everyday, I keep thinking 'This could be my last time' & enjoy & savour it even more because of that..

Tell you something though, beer tastes SO much better when you think it could be your last one.
Yeah, i know damn well it isn't, but HEY...got to take advantage of this moving thing...


j-ster said...

I was sad about my Last Kirin Ichiban Shibori. But then I went back for a visit and had another one. I drank as much as I could while I was there, an then suddenly it was time to go again and it was the Last one again. And then I went back for another unexpected visit and got to have some more. I have now given up thinking that there will be a Last Kirin and am wondering when the Next will be...

Mind you, I could have an Asahi down the local any night of the week, but no.... no thanks.

Good luck with all the moving! There is indeed another life with all its ups and downs on the other side.

arumanda said...

yep. we're all on the other side. it takes time and effort and energy, but you'll be there soon. enjoy the process getting there.
special times.
ganbare xo

MissSin said...

Thank you, ladies!
Not much longer to go for me here. 2 weeks & counting....